Michael Steele, or Yung Steezy, as he’s known on the streets, wants to tap into the culture of hip hop to recruit a younger, more multicultural base to the Republican party. He’s already adopted the lingo (you da man, Steele!), but there are a few more steps he has to take to gain the trust of this community.

Crunk with power: Steele won’t be let “off the hook” for his curious comments anytime soon.

Renew your license to ill.

Wear a band-aid on your cheek a la Nelly. Say the band-aid symbolizes the Democrats’ plan to fix the economy.

Refer to the White House as the “House of Pain” and Capitol Hill as “Cypress Hill.”

Send Soulja Boy to Iraq to become a real soldier.

Hold a press conference where you stand under Rihanna’s umbrella (make sure Chris Brown doesn’t see you).

Point out that while the rap world may have its share of criminals — such as T.I., 50 Cent and Lil’ Kim — so do the Republicans (Scooter Libby, Ted Stevens and Mark Foley)!

Award Dr. Dre an actual doctorate (either in African American studies or rhymeology), assure people PhD does not stand for “playa hatin’ degree.”

Remind rappers that Republicans also enjoying bragging about their ever-growing collections of guns and threatening to use them, especially if you approach their property (but use the slang word “turf”).

Draft a bill to make the day of 2Pac’s death a national holiday (make sure it’s a 2sday).

Have Pharrell compose background beats for your speeches, then release remixes of them.

Remind them rich Republicans are the true originators of bling (long before rappers were pimping rides, GOPers were tricking out yachts, aka “sailing dirty”).

Set aside time to get jiggy with it at least once a week.

Show the Dems platform is government rules and regulations, whereas Republicans are in favor of Ja Rule and reggae-lations (defined as “having sex while listening to Bob Marley”).

Meet grill-to-grill with the most popular rappers. Ease yourself in with Kanye West. Chances are, he’ll be wearing a collared shirt — just like you!

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